I arrived tardy to the party, but just in time to see Dirty Harry get wheeled out there like Hannibal Lecter sans the facemask. Mind you that I have much respect for Clint Eastwood, he's an iconic actor, he makes and directs great movies, has a nice looking wife, and some cute kids, even though the one girl's eyes are damn near on the sides of her head. Anyway this cat is up there talking shyt to a damn CHAIR. There's laughter in the air, but it's a nervous laughter. You know, the kind you when you don't want to be singled out by the comedian on stage. Mr. Eastwood was up there rambling on, and the Romney team put out a comment distancing themselves from him so damn quick... I mean dude was still on stage and the Romney team was like "Who the f**k let the drunk uncle take the mic?!" Msnbc's Rev. Al Sharpton said that they needed to snatch him up like they did failing acts at the Apollo Theater. Rachel Maddow had me rolling though; she said she got up from the stage and when and had a cookie when Clint Eastwood was up there because she thought that her blood sugar was low and that his speech was a hallucination. Immediately after the Eastwood speech Rachel had a face like "W-T-F?!" At the end his speech garnered the same reaction as the first sighting of Lady Gaga's meat dress. Mr. Eastwood, you did an OUTSTANDING job representing Republicans! Thank you very much for coming out sir, and please, Mrs. Eastwood see that he takes his meds before going to bed..
Ok, Marco Rubio... Did you know that an anagram of his name is "C U Mario Bro"? F**k it, I don't know where that came from. Anyway this dude gets up there and starts telling stories about Cuba, immigrants, and his upbringing and what-not, but this dude ended the story like, "...and you know who that little boy was? It was Mitt Romney." I was like what the hell?! How you gonna tell a story and make it seem like it is about you, and then at the end say that it's someone else?! If I was up there I would have shoe'd him in the behind and said "Get your story-tellin ass off the stage!" I saw a little of terror on his face though when he stated that they were "for" government and "against" freedom, or at least that is what it sounded like he said.
So, Mitt Romney comes out there like he's on his way to the ring. "Romney the Robot" could really have used that little boy from the Real Steel movie to give him some more life, and a couple of dance moves. He gets on stage and it's straight teleprompter time with emotional cues: *smile, *get teary eyed, *pivot .73 degrees... It was like watching those robotic mannequins that move and talk. I swear that there must have been some guy backstage with a big remote control! How is this Romney gonna get up on stage and just start pandering... Let me talk about my parents, my father struggled and "convinced my mother, a Hollywood actress, to marry him and move to Michigan.", he brought her a rose every day, (explaining his father's death) one day when there was no rose she went looking for him. A woman in the audience had her hands over her mouth in a gasp, as if it was the most moving thing she had ever heard.
He continues on methodically... I like women, my wife is a woman, I've actually HIRED women to work for me. I'm surprised he didn't get into something about their high-heeled shoes being the right height. He goes on to talk about President Obama and how it was Seal Team Six that actually killed Osama bin Laden and not the president himself. Okay, that's true, but what about George W., and him on the ship in his flight suit with a "Mission Accomplished" banner, like he himself won the war?! Halfway in to Romney's speech I noticed that the crowd starting to glaze over. When the cameras weren't playing "Where's Waldo" with the five black people there (gotta try and rectify that 0% vote with African-Americans thing), they showed a crowd that really didn't seem to pay attention. They applauded as is there was a flashing sign telling them to do so, and I think that at one point they had to be directed by a "hypeman" of the sorts to "boo" instead of applaud when talking about President Obama. It was like "Yaaay...uh...oh on... I mean, "boooooo!" It even appeared that Newt Gingrich had nodded off and had to be poked by his "Stepford Wife" whenever a camera was pointed in their direction.
He sprinkled the tank with flakes of lies and half-truths. Medicare, he makes it sound like President Obama is taking away benefits from seniors when the truth is that Pres. Obama is making it more affordable for seniors. He talked about it being possible for students to go to better schools, yet his side is against teachers' unions, or any union in general. He talked about energy independence utilizing limited strategies, failing to mention solar and wind. How is this dude gonna talk about getting people back to work when he has sent thousands of jobs overseas himself?! How are you going to blame gas prices on the president. The president does NOT regulate gas prices!
Mitt Romney then asked if "we" felt the same way about the president and we did on the day we voted for him. My answer is no, I feel BETTER about him now than when I voted for him. President Obama is "bustin' his ass" trying to get this country on the right track. We ARE in better shape than we were four years ago. Back then the sky was falling and G.W. was packing his bags while being pushed to the limit by Cheney to do as much destruction to the country as possible before their time was up.
So, I felt great about President Obama then, I feel greater about him now, I will feel great when I go to vote for him in November, and I will be ecstatic when he WINS re-election.
Once Romney was done with his speech his henchman Paul Ryan comes on stage, then their wives, then all these Romney clones with their wives, and what to me looked like multiple copies of the same little boy.
On a final note you KNOW that the Godfather of Soul, James Brown, is turning over in his grave because those cats played a cover of "Living in America". Why is it that the Republican party always has someone saying "Don't play my music at your convention!"
I heard persons on msnbc say that Romney did a really good job with his speech; not in my opinion. For me the real winner of the night was Clint Eastwood. Nothing like the perfect example of the Republican party getting out there and talking to an empty chair to "...make my day!"
If I missed stuff then, f**k it. This wasn't supposed to be this long anyway.
